50 Things I Hate About Usui Takumi
by Dangel Aemon
Summary: 9) I have never seen the guy eat anything at Maid Cafe except a small sundae or a coffee. It's not like I would be his wife one day and decide to actually learn how to cook. But when he showed me his appetite, Jesus Christ, it was so freaking scary I wonder how he keeps his hot steamy six-packs- I mean, ahem, ugly yet skinny V-shaped body.


**Hey guys,**

**Sorry I haven't updated in forever, there was no wifi at my new home. I've been busy with moving and adjusting to some prestigious school that shoots homework and projects at you like an AK-47.**

**Moving on, this is my new short story called 50 Things I hate About Usui Takumi. It's a short five chapter story of some little thoughts in Misaki's point of view. Just read and enjoy this little five-shot~**

**Happy Reading!**

**-KW**

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**50 Things I Hate About Usui Takumi**

Today, Sakura stole my diary. Yes, that girl can be sweet, but she does definitely have evil blood flowing her veins. And guess what? She just had to read it to Usui. Usui Takumi of all people!

The very person I did not want to show it to...

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50 Things I Hate About Usui Takumi

1) I freaking hate his hair. His golden blonde hair that makes the sun seem dull- no, it just had to be barf color. I bet the guy probably dyed his hair blonde on purpose to attract all this stupid attention, and breaking all these girls' hearts. Yes, I blame it all on his stupid hair. Since Gerard, his own half-brother, even has dark hair, it makes no sense that he has to blonde. So either he dyed his stupid hair to make me jealous, or he's secretly BALD. At first, I thought it was all spikey and hard, but who knew it would be so soft and smooth and nic- I mean, gross. Yes, gross.

2) His height, I swear is abnormal. And I hate it so, so much. Why does he have to so freaking tall? Does he drink three gallons of milk every day or something? Whenever he stands next to me, I feel like a child talking to her onii-chan instead of her boy- her sworn enemy, yes, enemy. I hate his height so badly that I wish there was a secret pill that could shrink him into a pocket-sized Lego man. Then, I could carry the little guy in a jar and keep an eye on the perv so he doesn't try anything. Not that I like watching him.

3) Usui the pervert always pets me like some cat. Do I look like one? No. Probably his obsession over Licht has taken over his perverted brain. But either way, whenever his hand makes contact with my hair, it makes me all warm and fuzzy inside... Nahh... That's probably because it's summer.

4) I hate his eyes. They just have to emerald green and seem to suck your soul out if you stare into them over three seconds. I swear that guy is on a whole other level on hypnotizing that Kanou. That guy is a hazard to society, he's lucky that I haven't reported any of this to the police. He should probably get an eye patch for the sake of society- wait, wouldn't that make him look even cooler? No, I did no just say that. I meant cookoo. Slip of the tongue.

5) Usui and his infamous perverted acts. He always touches me like I'm his. Who does that? Sometimes I feel like smacking his head off when he "accidentally" drops his pen on the floor and gets it. And of course he doesn't miss any chances to also "accidentally" touch my leg. Either he has problems with his hand that cannot hold anything properly, or he's asking these opportunities to harass me in public.

6) I swear the guy has X-ray vision; he teases me about my underwear print EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. And how shameless can he get, flipping up my skirt in alleys?!

7) I hate his alien powers. Period.

8) His freaking ability to do anything. Really, the guy can polish a shoe like a pro and totally kill anyone at chess. And I hate when he rubs it in my face by not saying anything. I bet inside, he must be like: Misaki must be so shocked and proud! Haha, I can do all fifty things you name on the top of your head and more. Not that I'm jealous of him, it just makes me feel helpless since it always seems like HE was the savior from all my troubles.

9) I feel like tearing him apart. I have never seen the guy eat anything at Maid Cafe except a small sundae or a coffee. I have never seen him eat a proper meal. It's not like I want to go on a date with him one day and order the proper amount of food at the restaurant so I wouldn't be embarrassed, or that I would be his wife one day and decide to actually learn how to cook. But when I told him to show me how much he ate, Jesus Christ, it was so freaking scary I wonder how he keeps his hot steamy six-packs- no, ugly V-shaped body.

10) I hate his ability to cook. I think he either cooks so perfectly and wonderfully to shove it in my face and say, "Oh look, the girl who sets kitchens on fire can't cook, and look at me! ME! ME! Haha, I can cook so perfectly... blah blah blah..." (Not that he'll actually say this...) And for your information, I do not burn kitchens or scare the fire fighters. It makes me seem like an undomesticated women who sits around and make her man do all the housework. Excuse the "her man" part.

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**There goes the first little chapter. And FYI, I'll upload 10 "hateful" things of Usui-san per chapter. I'll also possibly update on my other stories during the weekends. And I have to give credit to My Hopeless Romantic, an author I have always admired for inspiring me to write this fanfic. Please check out her 50 Reasons Why I Hate Mikan Sakura!**

**Thanks,**

**KW**


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